Pontoon Boat Splash

Before I Knew Funny Bone and Smash,

There was an Unwanted Pontoon Boat Splash!

It was the late summertime in the latter part of the 1990s. I was with my sales team on a celebratory outing, unwinding after another intense campaign. My team was very supportive and lots of fun.  We were tight like a family and teasing was the norm.

The Three Stooges were giggling, if guys can do such a thing.  Is “snickering” more manly?

Most of the team was in the lake splashing around freely like happy fish that had just been released from the fish bowl at the store.

Back then, I made it clear that I like the  view of the water from the boat. The rest of the team accepted  that but the Three Stooges thought it would be really funny to toss a very unwilling, fully clothed “me” into the lake.

You Jest!

Although I knew this was a ridiculous idea, the goofy trio thought it was hysterical and clever!

Alas, I went SPLASH!

Studsky and Husky (our version of Starsky and Hutch) were flanking the boat at the time and apparently, I nearly caused cranial damage to them with my unwilling dismount.

Picture a mermaid with her flippers clipped anxiously wanting to do circles in the water and blow water out with grace.

Remember, this is me we are talking about.

I looked like an angry wet rat, gasping for air, thinking I was going to plunge down to my demise in the very deep floor of the lake. it seemed like a REALLY long time that I was under water but I am sure that time stands still during a moment like this.

Husky, heroically, plucked me out of the water back to safety.

Today,  I talked to Husky to get clarification on what really happened that day. He still remembers watching my impressive dismount  that ruined his drink.


The fact that, here we are 11 or 12 years later, and I can still pick up the phone and start the conversation like it was yesterday; speaks a higher volume than that of any lake.


Posted on April 6, 2011, in Rant and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. Interesting tale. I must say that you may have cleared up a sceintific mystery with your story. Scientists have been studying for years the mysterious drop in water levels in Lake Michigan that began in 1998 (could of that been around the time of this incident?), In early 1998 water levels were at a historic high of 576.2 ft., later in the year the water levels fell to a low of 574.2 ft. – and have stayed there ever since. HOW MUCH WATER DID YOU GULP?

    Thanks for the great stories…I look foward to them everyday.

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